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Chris Doucet's "Proud Parents" Aristocrats Joke

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us."

The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute."

The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."

The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."

The father beings the show by clearing his throat while the daughter and mother who surprisingly enough are both named Floresta and who have a predisposition to alcohol begin to move the agents furniture out of the way to clear the path for their debut!!

The father lets a low note belt. DO
-The daughter counters. RE
- The Mother answers again ME
The son takes the Family Dog, "Teller" out of it's cage and sticks a splintered twig up the dogs vaginal opening and sure enough, the dog joins in to complete the quartet with a melodic rendition of a Bohemian Rapsody. After the beginning intro, the family trickles into an eminiem cover in which they all begin to lip sink the rap, unconvincing like.

A 7 year old sized cage made of conducting metal is wheeled into te agents office from just outside the door. Timmy jumps in eager to show off te fact that he had been practicing his cues! Silly Timmy, he forgot the words to the song, The lyric goes Blood, guts, guns, cuts
Knives, lives, wives, nuns, sluts. So Timmy gets in the cage and Mother gives him a little tug on the cheek with her right hand hand a violent tug on his pee pee with her left hand. SHe pulls it so far and so hard that lacerations begin to appear.. Oh wow Mom says little timmy, This is what we've been practicing for...The mother takes an emery board and starts to file the young boys peepee as it is fully exteneded to a painful degree. His pee pee starts bleeding and this causes the mother to file even more violent. When the boys penil is about to come off the father fishhooks his 9 year old daughter, spits in her mouth and forces her to suck off her bleeding brother. Then the father and mother collectively begin to finger their daughters nine year old asshole. Mother sticks a finger in, father sticks a finger in. The boy stops wimpering and so the father pulls his daughters hair to remove her mouth from her brothers cock . THe mother still with one finger in her daughters ass pours a large amount of salt in the daughters mouth in order to further stimulate the brother. Timmy yelped with excitement when she resumed his blowjob.

The father and mother both with a finger in the daughters ass begin to stretch in opposite directions until the tiny butt jewewl begins to crack . Little drops of blood start to spew out and the mother generously licks them out. At this time, the mother is supposed to get tounge fucked by the family dog, but one of the splinters broke off in the dog and that ruined her performance. So dad decided to use this as a chance to improvise in this dramatic interpritation and started to eat the dog out and spits the dog juices into his sons mouth. The daughter meanwhile screaming for her life gets fucked by her father brother and then eatn out by her mother. The little girl is then held down by her mother and brother while her father cuts one of her fingers off and uses it to gag the helpless little preteen. Timmy then is hit on the back of the head with a stapler and has a scarf then tied around his neck as he is gagged in 6 inches of water while the girl who is being anally ravashed by her parents and finger fucked with her own bloody digit is the willing enough to attack her brother with a sock filled with dirt. Borther is then released and begins to fuck the daughter in the mouth which forces her bloody finger down in her throught. The mother bends over and allows her son to throuat fuck her daughter deep until the blood daps the end of his penis and then trasfers it to his mother ass and then back to the daughter. The father then takes a knife and fucks the little boy in the ass with it as the mother vommits on the floor where the daughters missing finger was bleeding onto the floor. The puke and the blood form a lovely substance which is desired in a situation like this, but was missing a key element. Feces. The daughters asshole now loose and bloody enough to gently slide your head into was being penetrated by the mothers hand as she reached deep in her daughters guts to remove little bits of half digested food and clumpets of shit. She then eats this and uses her sons dick to gag herself to puke it up on her puke that was covered in blood and shit from the daughters bloody shitty ass. The boy cums in the mothers mouth and dies from the mother fucking him with a knife. The father moves over and starts to fuck his dead sons body on the pile of shit and piss...oh yeah, there's piss too...and the daughter is strangled by the mother and dies. The father pulls out of his son and the mother releases her daughter and they take a step back and hold hands and marvel at the wonderous children that they raised and were sucj proud parents that they gave this preformance thier all!!

For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?"

And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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