thatsickfuck's "a Disturbing performance not for the Feeble minded" Aristocrats Joke
A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us."
The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute."
The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."
The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
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The father and son take centre stage, the rest of the family standing backstage.
The teenage son and father start the act with a seemingly deep and meaningful conversation.
"Dad, I know at time I may not be the best son, nor the brighte..." he is suddenly interrupted by his father "son, no matter what happens, I will always love you" the son replies "I love you too dad" they hug as the music starts, a happy tune is played, all of a sudden the father and son kiss gently. They look into each others eyes, and over come with lust they passionately kiss each other grabbing each others body tightly, the son goes down on his knees whipping out his fathers monster cock and taking it in his throat. Giving a prime blow job to his father who is now wincing in pleasure. The father pulls out of his sons mouth and sprays his hefty load onto his sons chest, this ques the family pet into the scene, the dog jumps up and hungrily laps up the semen from the young mans chest as if it had been starved for days, when the son takes the dog in his hands flipping him over and sticks his stiff cock into the dogs tight arse, fucking him aggressively. *the father exits stage* and the son continues reaming out the dogs now swollen anus, he pulls out and blows his load onto the dogs back and rubs it into his coat like he was applying sunscreen to another person. *the daughter enters the stage and kneels down beside the son and dog* "can I help" she asks, the boy replies with a grin "sure".
The daughter stands up and drops her skirt revealing her recently shaven vagina, she spread her lips and pissed onto the dog while the boy massaged it into the dogs back, suddenly the son snaps the dogs hind legs which causes it to unleash a bark that would bring tears to your eyes, the mother bursts out onto the stage unclothed and pushes the son out of the way holding the wounded dog in her arms. The dog looks up at her, and there is a pause, the mother cries and the dog licks her cheeks. She starts massaging the dogs tongue and mouth with hers while repeating "your okay, you'll be fine".
she stars tugging the dying dogs penis as if it would heal him. the daughter sits back and spreads her leg, the son lyes down in front of her and begins to lick her salivating cunt. The daughter smiles and lets out a sickening fart that could rip your teeth out. The son however is not phased and is in fact extremely turned on by the toxic bowl release, at this point the mother is sucking off the dog which ejaculates a large quantity of come onto the mothers chin as the dog slowly passes away the father re-enters the stage. the mother breaks down with her face buried in her hands over the pets death, the father moves her hands from her face, kissing her, exchanging his spit for the dead dogs semen. The daughter lets out a horrific scream as she comes on the sons face.
The family makes not a sound as they stay in their positions, when finally the father breaks the silence, shitting a vast amount of diarrhettic fecal matter boasting a terribly vulgar sounding gurgle which echoed with out the studio, all together the family and dog jumps into their well choreographed positions and sing "TA-DAAAAAAAAA"
For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?"
And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"