Corey's "Acrobatic Dick" Aristocrats Joke
A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us."
The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute."
The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."
The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
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The father steps back. Then he says, "alright son, he wants to see the act, so whip it out." The son whips off his pants to reveal what looks like a flesh-colored garden hose taped to his inner left thigh. This hose runs from his crotchal region to his ankle, just above his shoe line. Turns out, this was no hose.
Being unprepared, he had to remove the tape. This, ever since he was a small child, had always been quite a painful process, but now as a post-pubescent boy, he had all his clingy innerthigh man hairs to contend with. However, being the consumate performer, and seeing the show-stopability in the removal process, he ripped the tape and most of the hair from his leg with a flourish.
Seeing that he was riffing, the daughter caught hold of a few pieces of tape as they flew through the air, and began removing hair from the strips and flossing with them.
The dog begins playing circus theme music remeniscent of bears balancing on balls on a miniature xylophone with his little dog pecker. The mother then gently strokes her son's cock, with the gentleness of a mother and the professionalism of a showman, just to get him excited enough for a semi. Then, she wraps his dong between his legs and shoves it up his own ass. She shoves quite hard, just to make sure it is secure. Then, with the agility of a squirrel, the son jumps on his father's shoulders, reaches up and dangles by his arms from the chandelier in the center of the room.
Then, the acrobatic's routine begins. It is essential that the son's cock remain firmly in place, so he is constantly clenching his anal walls to keep it in place - this is where the real athleticism comes in. He has trained for years for this moment, and now it has arrived.
The father jumps up and takes his son's rod in his hands like a trapeze artist, and begins swinging back and forth. The daughter begins to remove her clothing in unison with the mother, positioning themselves directly below their cock-swinging family member. The dog awaits his shining moment patiently.
The father, once he has a good swing going, locks on to his son's dong with his knees, so that he is hanging upside down. Then, he begins masturbating with his dominant right hand (to speed up the act) and gagging himself with his left. As he begins to come, he begins vomitting and shitting at the same time. The shit is quite runny, and spews forth from his ass like a bubbling guiser, running down his back, through his hair, and eventually, along with the cum and vomit, landing on his prone and naked wife and daughter lying below.
The father takes a final big swing on his son's faltering wang, kicks out into a full sommersalt, and lands with all the accuracy and skill of an olympic gymnast.
The son jumps down from the chandelier, stands next to his father, and slings his weakened package over his shoulder and awaits the grand finale.
The father shouts - "ride the gravy train!!!! Age before beauty!!!" The dog immediately shoots from his position behind the xylophone and begins licking the vomit, cum, and diarhea from first the mother's, then the daughter's love zones. He licks with his sloppy tounge until both are brought to orgasm.
The family stands together, lock arms behind each other's backs, and then takes a grand sweeping bow.
For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?"
And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"